"God is pursuing with omnipotent passion a worldwide purpose of gathering joyful worshipers for Himself from every tribe and tongue and people and nation…Therefore let us bring our affections into line with His, and, for the sake of His name, let us renounce the quest for worldly comforts and join His global purpose."
    -- John Piper

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    What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it?

    In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

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Distracted, Disjointed and Confused

I feel like Dory.  Do you remember Dory from the movie “Finding Nemo”?  She is the little blue fish with the short attention span who can’t remember anything and can’t stay focused on anything for more than about six seconds. 

 Why is my attention span so short?  Do I have short-term memory loss?  Is it all the noise?  Is it the length of the ‘to do’ list? (Or the fact that I need a ‘to do’ list at all?)  Is it email?  (Stupid email).  Cell phone?  Maybe it’s Facebook.  I don’t know.  As I am supposed to be surrendering to God’s will, I can’t seem to stay focused on exactly what that means.  I think my intentions are good, but life is getting in the way…life that is full of a bunch of stuff that I seemingly need to do.  Me…it’s all on me, me, me, me…or so it seems. 

 I know there has to be more to this life than simply getting out of that nice warm bed at 5AM, going through the entire routine that is my day, and finding the same bed some 17 hours later.   At least there is supposed to be more, right?  Keeping my life in balance seems to what I am striving for, because it’s safe, and generally easy. 

 I find myself taking solace in doing something out of the ordinary in a given day.  Somehow I am convincing myself that by completing one little project, or reading something insightful, or helping with this project, or that task, I have broken free of the routine and I am achieving….what?  Absolutely nothing…zero, nada, zip, nothing! 

 And when something worthy is set before me, I can’t stay focused on it for more than two minutes before my brain wanders off….oooh, look, something shiny!!!

 For example, I’m reading ‘Crazy Love’ by Francis Chan.  (As an aside, I whole heartedly recommend this book, especially if you find your walk with God a little flat these days…I think you will be encouraged, challenged, and smacked around a bit).  At one point, Pastor Chan is discussing being ‘lukewarm’ and how we have sugar coated the term and somehow have convinced ourselves that we can be ‘lukewarm’ and still get to Heaven someday.  (go, right now, and buy the book)   He suggests that we take a look at Jesus with a fresh perspective by re-reading the Gospels in one sitting from the perspective of a 12 year old who was trying to figure out who Jesus is and what He desires from us. (pages 84-86)   Do you know how many times I’ve started?  I get to about the 15th Chapter of Matthew and something shiny grabs my attention again….and I’m off like Dory following Marlin into a sea of jellyfish tentacles. 

 If I can’t stay focused on four books (or even one) of the Bible long enough to reacquaint myself with the Savior, what good am I?   I guess I’m trying to hard to surrender.  Is surrendering work?  I don’t think so.  I told you I was going to screw this up.  I seem to be doing a pretty good job of it lately, too.  I think the formula is surrender then work, not work to surrender.  Oh, I don’t know. 

Somehow I stuck with this disjointed, random blog post long enough to write some 500 words.  Maybe I can figure out how to read the book of Matthew in one sitting.  I’ll start there.

2 Responses

  1. In the few minutes left before I need to take of for work, I decided to go to at least one of the blogs I really appreciate, and I came over here. I know why. I know this one! I don’t have any answers except that I have always been able to find some ‘stuff of life’ I can manage better and sometimes dump altogether.

    I think surrendering is work in the sense of ‘working out our salvation’ as opposed to work done in order to gain favor with God.

    I nee to vist here more often.

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